My husband doesn't take pictures of me: Feminist Advice Friday paid subscriber bonus

A husband will only take a handful of unflattering photos of his wife.

A reader asks…

My husband does not take pictures of me. I know this is more than just a me problem because all of my friends seem to have the same issue.

Every now and again, I’ll ask him to take a photo or guilt him for not taking photos, and he’ll temporarily “try,” where trying means pointing the camera in my general direction and capturing a single, blurry photo of me. I once even made a Facebook album of the photos he captured of me next to photos I took of myself on the same day. The difference was revealing. The photos he takes of me make me feel terrible about myself, so now I try to avoid them.

Meanwhile, our home is filled with hundreds of photos I’ve painstakingly taken of him. They’re beautiful. The legacy they leave suggests he was always present and I never was. The reality is much different.

I really want pictures of myself with my kids. I want them to remember me when I’m gone. Am I being unreasonable?