Subscriber chat: What are you doing for Valentine's Day?
Plus, a flash sale on membership, and an update on t-shirts and the podcast
Welcome to this month’s Subscriber Chat! My monthly subscriber chat is unique because it’s the only time I allow comments from anyone. And these comments won’t show up in your social media feeds, which means you can safely say whatever you want without your husband, mother-in-law, or boss seeing it. Feel free to comment anonymously.
This is the space to discuss whatever is on your mind, to ask for advice from the community, and to ask me anything. Consider this an AMA, where no questions are off limits.
I’ve been telling men that every holiday is made up for a long time, and reminding them that a hallmark of not being a low-value man is caring about the things your partner cares about, and seizing opportunities to help her feel loved. But they don’t listen. Because, of course, the problem has never been women’s communication or that men don’t understand. It’s that men want low-effort, high-reward relationships, and that’s what patriarchy has to offer.
So how’s your Valentine’s Day going? Are you celebrating? If so, how? How are you feeling about your partner? Feel free to share in the comments, and seek support from this community if you need it!
Valentine’s Day Flash Sale
I’m running a flash sale on membership in honor of Valentine’s Day. Score 20% off of a monthly or annual Substack membership, today only. You can buy as many as you like, so this is a great Galentine’s Day present—or divorce celebration, or gentle nudge to your bestie that it’s time to get the fuck out of her life-destroying relationship.
Paid subscribers get at least two pieces of additional content each month, as well as the opportunity to join the totally private, heavily moderated Liberating Motherhood support group, which members have called “life-changing,” “a substitute for the village I don’t have,” and “the safest place on the Internet.”
Buy a membership for yourself here.
Podcast and t-shirts and more
The podcast is almost here! It’s just taken a bit more time to get launched than I anticipated.
The first episode will be out in early March. This is a beta/intro episode that’s an AMA with my husband and me. We’re answering questions readers submitted in December and January, and there are some great ones. I thought this would be a nice soft intro, and a way to tweak any issues before we release the first official episode, which will be out in mid-March. More details on that to follow.
Paid Substack subscribers will get first access to the podcast episode, right in your inbox. Then everyone else will have access a few weeks later—more details on where to listen coming soon, but you’ll definitely be able to listen here on Substack!
I am also about to start releasing t-shirts and stickers and a ton of other fun merchandise. That, too, will be out in March to celebrate the release of the podcast.
Is there a quote from me or something from an article I’ve written that you’d love to see on a shirt? Share it in the comments. If I use your suggestion, you’ll get a free shirt.
Here are some of my top Valentine’s Day posts from previous years:
I love Valentines Day. My partner and I buy eat other chocolate and cards, and we get a nice meal either at a restaurant or to cook at home (depending on money, day of the week, etc). It's low key and lovely, and we've been doing this for seven years now.
He is the first man I haven't had to beg for this from, excepting my high school boyfriend when I was sixteen years old. I don't ever feel I can volunteer this info to female friends, because none (NONE) of them have male partners who 'do' Valentines Day.
This will be my first Valentine's Day after separating from my husband. After years of this day never even being acknowledged, I am going to have a fun dinner with my kids tonight. Making my favorite Tuscan chicken recipe and I got flowers and a fun tablecloth and chocolate for them.
My ex husband called me and requested something for the kids, then had the nerve to say he loved me and happy Valentine's day, then proceeded to degrade and threaten me over text afterward because he didn't agree with an offer to settle our divorce. I'm ignoring it all and going to enjoy my day!