Subscriber Chat: What do you want young, unmarried women to know?
Talk about whatever you want in this month's subscriber chat
Welcome to this month’s Subscriber Chat! My monthly subscriber chat is unique because it’s the only time I allow comments from anyone. And these comments won’t show up in your social media feeds, which means you can safely say whatever you want without your husband, mother-in-law, or boss seeing it. Feel free to comment anonymously.
This is an Ask Me Anything post, as well as a place to discuss anything that is on your mind and get feedback from this community.
Every month, I ask a starter question to get discussion going. But you don’t have to answer it! You can talk about anything at all that’s on your mind!
I’m currently working on a piece specifically for women whose friends and family want them not to marry/have kids with someone they perceive to be abusive. If you could tell young women contemplating a questionable marriage just one thing, what would it be? What one red flag do you wish you hadn’t ignored?
Thanks for participating, and for keeping this community a safe, open, thoughtful space where discrimination and abuse have no place.
I want them to know that: yes, you can do it on your own. You don't need a husband, you don't need children, you can have an amazing, full, safe life without needing "a man's hand of protection" over you. This last part, I especially want young Muslim women to know - since I was raised Muslim and it was constantly drummed into my head that marriage to a man and children with him was the only safe path in life. But, it's truly not the only path.
From my experience with my own self-development and continuous learning, I believe it paramount that young women try to heal their Intergenerational traumas. Everyone has some sort of traumas. Before getting married and having kids, it would be best for everyone, if women would go to some kind of therapy. I speak only from the perspective of women here, as I am a mom of three kids and have been going through a lot of self-work in order to be able to enjoy my life, my kids and rise again as a new me postpartum. Obviously, the best case scenario would be if everyone (men included) tried to heal and be conscious of their own personal emotional history.