Yes, but it will never change their mind or make you "win" anything. Nonviolent communication is about knowing you did your level best to say what you needed to say in the best way possible. What actually happens once that message is out there is out of your control.
Also: Be prepared for abusive people (or even just passive-aggressive people not willing to own it) to frame your straightforward communication as "naive" or "not able to tell a lie" or even "stupid."
I will absolutely lie if I need to. It's not just necessary 90% of the time.
Cruel, manipulative, and generally not-great people always think their constant deception and use of 10 words where 1 will do is a sign of intelligence. It's not. Trump weaponizes this to the nth degree and his followers all fall for it hook, line and sinker. Hold the line and keep being clear where your safety is not at stake.
I spent years honing my communication skills trying to get my husband on board to help with family life. It didn't work on him, but it has helped for communicating with my kids.
I do think conflict resolution can take hours though, if you are dealing with one or more people with communication difficulties. I process all communication slowly. It takes me an hour or more, of solitude and intentional effort to come up with an effective reply to a difficult topic. So, a large conflict can easily take a day or more to resolve, depending on everyone's schedule and how much time I can safely allocate to pure thinking.
I think Zawn means more like, "If you are endlessly going in circles for 2+ hours and never actually making noticeable progress, that will not work and somebody is not participating in good faith."
Is nonviolent communication possible if the other doesn’t use nonviolent communication?
Yes, but it will never change their mind or make you "win" anything. Nonviolent communication is about knowing you did your level best to say what you needed to say in the best way possible. What actually happens once that message is out there is out of your control.
To an extent, yes. But if the other person is persistently abusive then communication needs to end
Also: Be prepared for abusive people (or even just passive-aggressive people not willing to own it) to frame your straightforward communication as "naive" or "not able to tell a lie" or even "stupid."
I will absolutely lie if I need to. It's not just necessary 90% of the time.
Cruel, manipulative, and generally not-great people always think their constant deception and use of 10 words where 1 will do is a sign of intelligence. It's not. Trump weaponizes this to the nth degree and his followers all fall for it hook, line and sinker. Hold the line and keep being clear where your safety is not at stake.
I spent years honing my communication skills trying to get my husband on board to help with family life. It didn't work on him, but it has helped for communicating with my kids.
I do think conflict resolution can take hours though, if you are dealing with one or more people with communication difficulties. I process all communication slowly. It takes me an hour or more, of solitude and intentional effort to come up with an effective reply to a difficult topic. So, a large conflict can easily take a day or more to resolve, depending on everyone's schedule and how much time I can safely allocate to pure thinking.
I think Zawn means more like, "If you are endlessly going in circles for 2+ hours and never actually making noticeable progress, that will not work and somebody is not participating in good faith."
Thanks so much for this. I’d be interested in more on what you think a good apology looks like.
‘Time is our most precious and finite asset. To steal another person’s time is to steal their life’
THIS RIGHT HERE IS A WORD 👆🏽