What is going on with men weaponizing tiredness?
Why patriarchy thinks women should accommodate men's tiredness, at any and all personal costs.
Why are so many men so tired? Or, more to the point, why do misogynistic men have boundless energy for golf, video games, porn, and their bros, but become so exhausted when there’s a baby, a chore, or a person with basic human needs to tend to?
I hear it over and over from my readers.
He’ll say he recognizes that household labor is unbalanced, but he just feels so tired and overwhelmed.
He wants to get up with the baby at night, but if he does, he’s in such a bad mood the next day that he ruins life for everyone.
He doesn’t notice the things that need doing because he’s resting on the couch—and of course, too tired to help her do the things she’s already noticed.
He’s in a bad mood on vacations because he’s just so tired.
According to every metric possible, women work longer and more hours than men, when you combine paid and unpaid work. Living with a man greatly increases a woman’s workload, and greatly decreases the man’s workload. Men get more sleep, wake up less often with children, and have more time for leisure. Women are more likely than men to have a chronic illness or autoimmune disease, and they may also be breastfeeding or recovering from birth while facing these issues. Sexism is also a factor in women’s well-being. Men simply do not have to adapt to sexism, feel the same terror in the world women face, or worry about how their gender will affect their health, safety, or pay.
Women overwhelmingly report feeling alone, stressed, and unsupported.
So why is it that men, who have more leisure, more sleep, fewer health issues, fewer responsibilities, and less stress, are so very tired?