Why do so many men ruin every holiday with a bad mood? Paid subscriber bonus

Why does he insist on ruining the magic his partner creates?

Halloween, for many families, marks the kickoff of the marathon holiday season. It’s also the beginning of a seemingly endless bad mood for men who exploit their partners’ domestic labor.

A bad mood is, after all, a great way to keep your family in line and prevent your partner from complaining. It’s no accident that sexist and abusive men treat their families to a bad mood during special occasions.

Here’s what the holiday mood might look like:

• contributing nothing to the holiday preparation process, but then complaining that it’s inadequate, too expensive, or wasteful

• refusing to do any emotional labor when company is present

• spending most of the holiday napping or watching football rather than helping or engaging with the family

• refusing to buy anyone presents

• picking a fight with their partner every year on the holidays

• skulking around, sullen and unhappy, while everyone else does their best to make the holidays a positive experience

• throwing a tantrum to get out of the one or two chores he volunteered to do

This is not an accident. Men weaponize these moods against their partners and families. So what is going on here, and what can you do about it?